LDR’s: Mine and how it blew my mind.

Open hearts, sunlight streaming in.

This post is a bit overdue… I started this blog for lots of reasons but there is one I hadn’t considered the value of until now: helping others. In honor of the two years we spent living 500 miles apart and in an effort to positively impact the lives this blog touches, I’ll express some of the nuggets of wisdom I’ve been blessed to take away from the whole Long Distance experience with Mr. Sunshine.

I can say that “success” in an LDR rides on your own:

1. Volition. Every day is an opportunity to give “it” your “all”.
2. Presence of mind. By “it”, I mean your current situation, this very moment in time, and by “all”, I mean the sacrifices it takes to truly embrace life.
3. Fuel. Hope isn’t bulletproof, but it’s essential to moving forward; be selective where you place it and fervently dependent upon it. It literally moves you.
4. Transparency. Get over yourself. Be honest. You’re not an artist, unless you actually pick up a medium and create. You are not in a relationship, unless you consciously pour your effort into every moment you have (weather it be on the phone, skype, person, etc.) Don’t fool around wasting time (yours and theirs) just so you can say you’re “in a relationship”. Be forthright with your motivations, your intentions, and your willingness to lay down ego to grow up and out of selfishness.
5. Responsibility. Eventually, you have to make THE choice… do you move forward or do you walk away? The sooner you make that choice internally, the sooner you can take action.
6. Perspective. Maintain your fluidity; there is no such thing as a straight line from “here” to “there”- 99% of life is undetermined and unpredictable. The 1% that is within your control is your free will and with it, you can see the undetermined and unpredictable for what they really are- inexplicably glorious waves of light pouring in to your mind and heart. You get to decide to ride them or let them swallow you up.
7. Vision. Your free will is your mark on the world around you, your sweater to knit, your meal to prepare, your garden to plant; what do you want to see come of it? Can you see how amazing you really are? What are you doing right now to achieve the outcome you desire?
8. Action. Multi-faceted communication is imperative to growing with someone. It extends far past actual words and relies on how boldly you believe and how humbly you walk.

Success within an LDR means that through it all- the miles, the tears, the meetings deferred- you simply learn to give yourself to another human being in every way that you can. Every relationship is the same… if you want it to work, you must work. If you want it to grow, you must grow. If you want it to evolve, you must evolve. There is no future without embracing and living this moment as it unfurls with the choices of your mind playing out in your heart.